How to Get Back Out There: Dating Tips for Divorcees
Navigating the dating world was hard enough the first time around, so getting back out there might seem impossible. Trust me, I know! I’ve been there.
Once you feel that it’s time for you to start dating again, you’re probably going to face obstacles and challenges you haven’t have to deal with for years. I want to empower you with a few pieces of advice.
These dating tips for divorcees can help when you head out on your next first date or find yourself entering a new relationship.
Be the you of today.
What does that mean? I promise it’s not a philosophical platitude!
What I’m trying to say is that it’s all too easy to slip back into nostalgia and wish you were back in your younger days. But you’re not in your 20s anymore (probably), and that’s ok!
Being newly single gives you the chance to reinvent yourself. Take time, and be the person you’ve always wanted to be. Enjoy the reinvention, and don’t be afraid to show it off.
Having the confidence to move forward allows you to be more open to new experience and new transitions in your life.
Don’t compare.
Every date and every relationship is different. Comparing a first date or meeting with a potential mate to the firsts with your ex is going to keep you stuck in the past.
Not all relationships turn out the same, so don’t go into a first date with expectations for how it should go and how it’s going to pan out. Keep an open mind.
Use what you’ve learned.
All of our past relationships teach us something. Use the lessons that you gathered from your past relationships and bring these experiences to new dates and relationships.
Remember that, by being married once, you have gained specific experience and knowledge about what could be ahead. Turn this experience into confidence as you step out the door to your next date.
You’ve been there and done this before, and this time you’re better prepared!
Be open and honest.
Are you looking for something casual or a long-term commitment? If you want someone to spend the rest of your life with, don’t be afraid to share the fact that you are a divorcee. Being divorced is not a shameful thing to admit, especially with divorce rates in our country today.
I’m not saying that you should spill all the details of your divorce on the first date (or, even worse, put them in an online profile). That might be a little off-putting. But be ok with saying that you’ve been married and divorced before.
If you still haven’t come to terms with your past relationship and your current status as a divorcee, I recommend taking some time off from the dating world to focus on some self-love and self-acceptance.
Be patient.
Even if you met your ex, fell in love, and got married really quickly, Rome wasn’t built in a day. You’re going to have bad dates. You’re going to meet real jerks. That’s how dating works at any age, no matter how much experience you have.
Don’t get discouraged or give up after one bad date or experience. And remember that first impressions can be deceiving; don’t write someone off in the first ten minutes of your encounter. Be open-minded.
Keep putting yourself out there with confidence and a positive attitude. It may take some time, but you will be able to fall in love again.
Rooting for you!
Sara Freed
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